Everyday Is Like Sunday

It can be hard to go to sleep at sea if one has never done it before. I remember as a young boy when I would spend the night on my grandparent's house boat in the summer. At night when you lay down to try and sleep the boat rocks. It feels as if you are constantly rocking back and forth and can be quite annoying if one is not use to it. Like most things in life though after awhile you no longer feel the constant rockiness from waves hitting the boat and it's just like sleeping in a bed on land.

The reason I'm even thinking about sleeping in a boat is because that's how I feel in my life right now. I feel like there is a constant rocking that's just slightly throwing my off of my balance, and I'm trying to get my balance back. I'm waiting to get re-adjusted.

I have had some people say some things to me recently that have just thrown me off, and seem to have come out of nowhere from my perspective. I feel my days living at home are numbered, and ultimately I'm sure that's more of a good thing than bad.

I think one problem that a lot of people have is pride. I have no pride, or at least very little and I don't want anymore pride. I think my lack of wanting pride makes people who are very prideful uncomfortable.

I am a musician, but I'm not prideful about my music, and usually won't go into detail talking about my own musical career unless asked.

I'm an educated person, but I don't boast my academic success, which is always a reason why I went to Ferris State University a college most have never heard of opposed to Harvard, University of Southern California, and other more prestigous schools I was accepted to. I went to school to get educated not to boast about my alma mater.

I have no pride in any job I've ever had. I do not believe in the Japanese business model, that you should take pride in your job. I think that's a stupid way to unbalance your priorities. I don't care about work or about having a career, because what does that get you when your dead? You gonna wear your gold watch when you're a rotting corpse in the ground. Have fun with that.

I believe you should do what you love, and fuck the rest. That tends me to live an unmateralistic, unmotivated to work, philosophical thinking, and for the most part stress free life. Yet when I tell people this, more people get pissed off than accepting of how I choose to live. I don't get it. I'm trying to figure it out, and the only thing I can decide is those who live very prideful lives and have a lot of pain in their heart doesn't like to see someone who lives without that unnneeded stress and pain. That makes me sad, I wish there was less anger in the world, and sometimes I feel I cause more pain than joy, which is not my intentions. I'm a musician to bring happiness to an unhappy world, but lately I somehow have been bringing a lot of anger to people. I don't feel any different, so I hope it's not me, and that's why I feel like my world is rocking in a sea of confusion. I still have hope for the future and am upbeat about things to come, so we'll see.